“Parenting is a full-time job.” We’ve heard that phrase time and time again, and we know it’s true. We’ve lived it and are living it. It requires endless love, patience, and dedication. If you’re a parent of a child with special needs, there’s an extra layer of complexity placed upon the role you play—doctor’s appointments, advocacy, therapy, and much more. Through it all, it’s important to remember that having a self care plan is crucial.
Your kneejerk reaction to this might be, “But that means I’m not prioritizing my child!” Take a step back, though, and you’ll see that in a way, self care for parents is child care. When you prioritize yourself, you create a stronger, healthier foundation for your whole family—child included. Let’s dig deeper into why self-care is so important and how it benefits you and your child.
Avoiding Burnout
When you’re a parent of a special needs child, there’s an increased physical and emotional demand you need to meet. If there’s nothing to counterbalance this, stress can accumulate, leading to exhaustion, burnout, or worse. By setting aside some time to “recharge your batteries,” you renew your energy reserves and regain the capacity to handle the challenges parenting throws at you. To achieve this, try going on a walk, engaging in a hobby, or simply enjoying some peace and quiet.
You can’t expect to remain effective while running on empty. Attempting to do so can make you—and in turn your child—miserable. A spritely you is much better equipped to tend to a child!
Modeling Healthy Habits
Monkey see, monkey do! Your child learns more than you realize by simply watching you. This can be a beautiful blessing or a curse depending on the example you set for them. When you follow a self care plan, you’re demonstrating balance, resilience, and emotional health to your child. It teaches your little one valuable lessons regarding self-respect and boundaries, which will help them immensely as they mature!
Strengthening Relationships
When your emotional and mental scales are in balance, you’re more able to be present and attentive in your relationships. The result is more meaningful interactions with your child. The lack of stress or frustration clouding your mind makes it much easier to connect.
Of course, parenting isn’t just about quantity. The quality of the moments you share with your child will have a huge impact on them. A well-timed, focused moment shared with them may be leaps and bounds more valuable than an hour’s worth of simply being in the same room.
Improving Problem-Solving Skills
Being the parent of a child with special needs likely means you’ll have to implement some creative problem solving. If you’re rested and centered, your mind is much better prepared to do this effectively at a moment’s notice. When you practice self-care, you’re arming yourself with the mental capacity to think critically and find innovative—and sometimes genius—solutions.
Building a Support Network
Taking time for yourself doesn’t necessarily just mean “me time.” It can also mean connecting with other family members and friends. After all, it’s good to have adult conversations from time to time. So take some time to connect with a friend, family member, therapist, or support group. These connections are more than just the conversations they seem to be on the surface. They’re emotional validation, and they may give you some much-needed perspective or practical advice that reminds you you’re not alone. A strong support network can lighten your emotional load more effectively than you may expect.
Self Care Ideas
- Schedule It: Self care doesn’t have to be an impromptu affair. In fact, expecting it to be will likely limit how frequently you actually get around to it. Instead, why not treat it like an appointment? Block off some time to focus on you, even if it’s just for ten minutes.
- Start Small: Your self care plan doesn’t need to be grand and elaborate. Sometimes it simply takes the form of a cup of tea, a deep breath, or a song that sparks joy.
- Ask for Help: There are plenty of people around you who are willing to help if you reach out. When you really need a break, you likely have someone who’s more than happy to lend a shoulder or provide restorative care.
- Set Boundaries: You don’t always have to say yes! Learn to say no to activities you know will leave you feeling drained.
- Celebrate Wins: Learn to recognize when you’ve been succeeding, even if it’s something as simple as getting out the door on time.
Self Care for Parents Is Essential
When you have a self care plan, you take care of your child too. You’re giving yourself the emotional energy to really love them and be there for them. It’s not about escaping your responsibilities; it’s about being better at them!
Parenting is an experience like no other. It’s filled with the highest highs and the lowest lows, but you don’t have to be pouring from an empty cup. When you implement some of the self care ideas above—or some of your own—things can get better. And if you’re still finding difficulty in implementing an effective self care plan, we’re happy to have a conversation with you and your child.
Start prioritizing yourself today!
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